School

When did parents stop caring or did they really ever? I don't mean loving your kids or wanting them safe I'm talking about education. We send our kids to school ask how there day was a trust it was good, trust the teacher at conferences and were good! I'm not good and either is my kiddo, truth is I would rather be homeschooling still but I made the decision for her to finish out the year in public school so I could regroup after my delivery of the boys. I'm second guessing this daily Sofia is probably one of the most adaptable children you will ever meet, after all she's been through three surrogacy pregnancies two of those have same sex parents, she's been through many changes in her short life and is a well adjusted child. The teaching method in her class however is not working so great! So what do I do? My plan is to be in the classroom often, LISTEN to my child and trust her and how she feels! Really it's our job isn't it.

Sunshine

If you live or have ever lived in the Pacific Northwest you know two things the weather can change and any given moment and the sun shines rarely. I for one have tolerated the lack of sunshine for almost 9 years in my mind I know this is a wonderful place to raise my daughter and it really is beautiful in the summertime. I'm not going to complain much this week because well the sun is shining and I love it and I soak it up to the point I don't want to come in the house even though its cold out. So if you live in a sunny part of the US please send me more I am a lover of the sun :) Have a blessed day!

Where oh where

Have I been? Who cares right!

Well I have been battling PPD not to terrible but terrible enough that it stopped me dead in my tracks and made me feel very vulnerable as a Woman. I never understood this whole PPD thing I just thought you have a baby you feel tired and push through, but you see as a surrogate mother their isn't a baby to keep you distracted. I took a trip to see the boys and upon my return couldn't shake this constant urge to cry but for me crying meant weakness, I'm not weak I'm strong after all I'm a mother a wife a surrogate mother I couldn't possibly be weak Right?WRONG! so I would get pissed off and let me tell you everyone around me felt that wrath. I'm 14 weeks PP now and while it is getting easier with each day I'm still not the person I was prior to the twins birth. Sometimes I wonder what set this whole thing off? was it the traumatic birth? Hormones? I'm not 100% sure but I am sure of one thing walking my butt into my midwife and explaining how I felt was the best thing I could have done.

How to fix this was the next question, I'm not much of a medication kinda gal so I went the natural route and its working. I stopped pumping for the boys this last week and while this was single handily one of the hardest things for me to do I know it was time, time to get back to taking care of me:) This story is long from being over so much more to tell, feel and experience I just cant wait to get going. Hope you will join me on this journey.